Halloween is coming up and while I don’t celebrate it, I thought it would be nice to share my thoughts on a very frightening location fit for the Halloween spirit.
It may not sound scary at first, because what can a bunch of stationary gnomes do? But then when you hear about the place’s history, you have to admit it’s a little creepy:
“A long, long time ago, a Gnome was travelling on an Australian country road. It was at night and far from anywhere. All around was leafy and green. A pleasant place.
By and by, he came to a fork in the road. He followed the road, which seemed to go around and around.
Now, being a little person, he could not see over the curb. If he did, the story would have ended here.
He walked all night with the feeling he was going nowhere. Roads branched off every so often.
By the morning, he was exhausted. Then it was clear. He had come across a ROUNDABOUT—a circular intersection in the middle of (almost) nowhere.
This was something he had never seen as a country traveller.
But it was a nice place and reminded him of home. There was a bubbling brook and shady trees.
So he stayed a while. And another while. Other Gnomes passed and visited, and many stayed. Word passed around.
Gnomes from far and wide left their gardens and came to visit. But they stayed. This was something new for the mostly solitary Gnomes. There was something irresistable about the place. It was as if the ROUNDABOUT was casting a spell.
But that is another story…
So Gnomesville was born.
Gnomesville now has thousands of Gnomes from near and far. They have set up in groups from all walks of life.
Big people like you and me visit to say hello and marvel at the magic of this place.
Nowhere in the world has such a community of little people sprung up from nowhere.”
I am usually a sucker for the fantastical but that kind of narration leaves me with a lot of questions. For instance, if the first gnome was a traveler, how did he not know what a roundabout was? Those kind of paths are everywhere in the world. This gnome wasn’t a traveler, he just ran away from home five minutes ago.
Next thing, how do people know about the history of Gnomeville if us ‘big people’ only see them when they are inanimate? Did a gnome animate himself for someone and snitched on the history of the place? Isn’t that against gnome rules?
And if a gnome did animate himself…what the hell? If Garden gnomes are walking around roundabouts, I would be highly concerned. Who knows if he’s the next Chucky doll or that homicidal leprechaun?
No, no. Australia can keep their creepy gnomes. I’ll be over here, enjoying my ‘non-homicidal little people’ life.